Affair Proof Your Marriage – Let the Love Back In
Can you overcome an affair? Yes, you probably can, with good solid advice move past an affair to enjoy a long happy relationship with the love of your life. But will you?You can prevent an affair from happening in your relationship and successfully love the one you chose forever. Let me show you the secret of loving for a lifetime.
Commitment It seems so easy and yet, so few actually make a commitment to make their marriage work. The reality is, when you make a commitment you choose to love your spouse above all others and for a lifetime. You choose to put your priorities in order and focus on the one you love forsaking all that is not about your spouse. Whether it’s work, your children, your life without him or her, or any other activity, you put it after your spouse.Dedication
No, it isn’t the same as commitment. While you make a dedicated commitment to your marriage, that is still not the same as being dedicated to your spouse. Just as you chose commitment, you must choose to dedicate yourself to your spouse. Once you do, all other priorities in your life step back and your spouse is your priority in all things. You’ll be thinking regularly, “does this improve my relationship with my spouse?” The answer will determine whether you continue with that activity.
Love
Love is a verb. It’s an active thing you do for your spouse and if it isn’t done in a way your spouse understands, you’ll have missed the focus of what love is all about. Every person has specific love needs and if those love needs are met by their spouse, the ties become stronger. If not, the person is forever seeking to have those needs met.
A dear friend desires heart string connections with the love of her life, who doesn’t have a clue. She loves him and is dedicated to him, but he never seems to make the effort to connect with her heart. His interest is in getting things done, organizing, and meeting her physical needs. He does a great job of that. However, the one thing she desires, he can’t understand a need for, which ultimately means he doesn’t try to fulfill her need. While she hasn’t strayed, she often looks to see if her needs might be met by another man better. The answer is yes, at some point her needs could be met by another man, and she may stray.Know your spouses love needs and meet those needs.
Joyful Exuberance
Promote that deep intimate feeling of joyful exuberance with your spouse. It may be a distant memory at the moment, but you can revive that intimacy that comes from knowing your spouse intimately and sharing the feelings you felt when your relationship was new. Give yourself a day to remember what it was like falling in love with your spouse, write those feelings down. What did you do to share those feelings with your spouse? Do them again. ALL of them, every day of your life together. Make a commitment to do all the things you did in the early days every day.
Safe Haven
One of the biggest reasons a partner strays is because they no longer feel safe in the arms of the one who loves them. They no longer feel secure and loved. That feeling of insecurity will send them out seeking a safe place to fall faster than any other feeling they experience. Give your partner a safe haven from the world. Provide a safe place to fall. No matter what happens outside in the world, remember that you are partners, not enemies and your arms are safe territory. If you have differences, solve them outside the bedroom, and outside your loving embrace. Provide a safe place for your spouse.
Do you want a relationship that lasts forever?
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I really liked your blog!
September 1st, 2009 at 10:05 pm